"I'm late, I'm late for
A very important date.
No time to say hello, good-bye,
I'm late, I'm late, I'm late" - The White Rabbit from "Alice in Wonderland"

August 2023 was a weird one grieving projects, the anniversary of my Grandmother and Father's deaths, it was summer and I hate summer and then it ended with me having my first bout of COVID-19. Which then spread to one of my roommates all on the weekend of our third roommates 40th birthday party. This meant she had to cancel because she cares about people and had been exposed (although praise God she didn't get sick).  I mean, I really could have lit that month on fire and sent its behind down the river because of how poorly it ended. I still don't understand what was going on with that month, but it's over now and I hope not to repeat it at any point...ever.

Because Miss Rona ruined our roommate's event, I concocted a plan to celebrate her birthday, albeit belatedly at the next weekend she had available. Due to her schedule that meant October. 

I told her to invite four of her closest friends and I would throw her a tea party at our apartment. I shared several photos from that event and a bunch of folks said they'd love to have the recipes, so here they are with my anecdotal notes and the usual storytelling.

My roommates favorite color is purple, so you'll see a lot of that throughout the pictures. 

One thing I want you to imagine as you read through this is, my roommates (including the birthday girl) decorating during my second night of cooking and assembling. The later it got the more punch drunk we got and laughing for no reason is our go to. It is a miracle everything went as great as it did. 

First up were the scones. I made them first, two days before the event in case they didn't come out and I had to buy some instead. When they came out of the oven, I was extremely proud of them. If you don't like them, keep it to yourself. LOL!! 

Yes, these are mine! No, this photo does not do them justice! 

Here's the recipe for Soft Scones 

Adjustments to my version: 

Girl, the way I HATE buying that quart of buttermilk that ALWAYS goes to waste because I bake with it once or twice a year. So, instead I make it with a cup of milk (usually non-dairy but it doesn't have to be) and a tablespoon of lemon juice or apple cider vinegar. Then I let that mixture sit for 5-10 minutes while I fix my other ingredients. You can adjust the ratios based on how much buttermilk you need in your other recipes that call for it. This little hack I found on these interwebs has not failed me yet. 

I also did not put any crunchy sugar on top because why? They are literally called soft scones, but then I'm going to ruin it by making them crunchy with sugar no one asked for on top?  Y'all know what I'm saying? Senseless. 

Next up is Mock Clotted Cream. Why mock clotted cream you may ask? Listen, go google a real clotted cream recipe and see how long it takes. I do not have eight to twelve hours to sit over a stove or crock pot scraping skim off the top of milk and what have you, girl I have job, friends, I'm on a board of directors. Ain't nobody got time for that. Also, this recipe tastes very good! 

The picture on the left has: Masker Orchards Pumpkin Butter (bought at the apple orchard I go to every fall), Lemon Curd (store-bought), Apple Butter (homemade) & Mock Clotted Cream (homemade). 

Mock Clotted Cream Recipe

The first time I made this "clotted cream" was many moons ago, but I remembered the mascarpone cheese. Ooooo girl! It's good. 

Crockpot Apple Butter Recipe 

    Yes, I picked the apples with my own two hands from trees in an orchard. You don't have to be that extra but I am. That was my Ina Garten moment. 

   And just let me be frank with you, this recipe is here for your sake. Because I do not agree with the lack of spices in her recipe. I put all of the fall spices in mine; nutmeg, cinnamon, ginger, allspice, cloves. And yes, I know essentially that allspice is called that because it has all of the spices but folks out here seem to be afraid of adding flavor to their food and you all really need to be released from that oppression. Get free and add some flavor to y'alls food. 

I have also switched up my sugar to include coconut sugar instead of brown sugar, but I did use demerara with the coconut sugar this year. 

And since I am my Grandmother Florence's Granddaughter and my Aunt Ethel's niece, I have no measurements for my version, I just eyeball it. So here's a recipe for you to follow if that's what you need to feel safe but I beg you to add more spices than what this woman is doing. Please for the love of all that is good and yummy! 

My favorite sandwich to have at a proper tea is a cucumber sandwich. Now, the sandwiches are where things went a bit off the rails because I definitely did not choose the right bread. Choosing sourdough was a poor life decision because if you're doing it right, you are cutting your sandwiches into traditional tea sandwich shapes and sourdough is just not about that life so cutting them was a struggle. I've learned my lesson for next time. Thanks be to God mine held together and no one knew of my trials and tribulations. They looked cute, which is really all that matters in the end. 

For the cucumber sandwich filling I used three ingredients:

1. Seedless Cucumbers thinly sliced

2. 3oz Herbed goat cheese

3. 4oz Cream cheese 

I mixed the goat cheese and cream cheese together adding more spices and then spread it on the bread. Then I placed the thinly sliced cucumbers on top to make a sandwich. These I then took off the crust and cut into stick shapes. 

And what is a tea party without chicken salad sandwiches?  See now, I'm not really for regular chicken salad (unless my family in NC makes it). I love to have pecans (or almonds), craisins (or grapes), curry and celery in mine. Also, I do not love mayo so I use plain yogurt in it. For this tea party that was my version of Coronation Chicken Salad because my roommate also does not love mayo. But like I said, for mine there are no measurements, I eye-balled it. If you desperately need a recipe, then go on Chatgbt.

Who wants to come to a party with no dessert? Maybe you know somebody, but I'm not friends with them and neither are my roommates so we had dessert. 

And since the Birthday girl loves chocolate I made an easy and quick chocolate mousse. Another recipe I have made before and was a hit. Again, many many moons ago. 

Easy Chocolate Mousse

This recipe has two ingredients y'all! If you mess this up, you need to just quick cooking because I really don't know what to tell you. Order out, hire help, something. It's only two ingredients. 

A staple that was taught to me over fifteen years ago are chocolate chip cream cheese cookies. One of my friends was kind enough to share it with me all those years ago and we baked my first batch together. I find them to be more addictive then regular chocolate chip cookies. I believe these are a family recipe of hers so I always title them with her name, except that she doesn't know y'all and I'm not giving her full name on these interwebs. 

Laura L's Cream Cheese Chocolate Chip Cookies

Ingredients:

1 Cup Shortening

1 Cup Sugar

1 Teaspoon Vanilla

8 oz. softened cream cheese

2 eggs

2 Cups Flour

1 Teaspoon Salt

1-12 oz. package semi-sweet chocolate chips

Directions: 

Mix together shortening, sugar, vanila cream cheese and eggs.  Then add Flour and salt and mix.  Then add chocolate chips.

 

Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes.

Since we had some gluten free folks I went to one of my favorite bakeries in the city called By The Way Bakery. They are gluten free and dairy free which comes in handy because I have friends with dietary restrictions and had two of my birthday cakes from here so those friends could partake. 

For this event I wanted a decent bread and I was just not going to do Udi's. I know some of y'all like it but this is a special occasion and I just wasn't doing it. 

I also purchased their scones and desserts from By The Way because we are not a GF household and cross contamination when baking scares me. I'm not having folks come to my house to get sick. It's also just about community care. A phrase one of my friends came up with that I wish we focused on more in this country, but alas that conversation is for my other blogs. 

And since it is a tea party and this roommate and I LOVE Anne of Green Gables, I had to make raspberry cordial. You cannot have a tea party without at least one reference if you love Anne. We watched Anne with an E together and loved it. We also love the ones with Megan Follow
s, but there is room in our hearts for both. And I'm going to tell some of y'all right now, I will not tolerate any slander for either of these iterations anywhere near me. Anne of Green Gables Raspberry Cordial

The last recipe I'll share I actually promised folks in 2022. It's for the apple butter spice cake I made a week later for my roommate to take to her Mother in Connecticut. I had also made it in the fall of 2022 for the first time to share with my film co-creators. Both times I made it with the homemade apple butter.

November 2022 Dear Brutus Pre-Production Meeting

Apple Butter Spice Cake

You might be wondering, wasn't this a birthday party? Where is the birthday cake? Do you think, I made everything I just told you about, purchased all the decorations, ran all the errands needed to make this day happen and still baked a birthday cake? Like I said, I have a full life with boards, podcasts, etc. Your girl just entered her 40s and is getting smarter about knowing her limits. Old me would've also tried to do this. New me is like girl, let people help you and stop doing too much. So, I purchased cupcakes from By The Way Bakery which also meant our gluten free folks could enjoy them without worrying. 

In conclusion, there are a few takeaways I hope everyone who chooses to read this leaves with besides just the recipes. Firstly, you don't need to do everything to make a great event. Know your limits so you're not in the kitchen still cooking or cleaning up when people arrive. It's the worst when you can't actually relax and be with the people you invited to your home to be with.  Secondly, to avoid said scenario, LET PEOPLE HELP YOU! If you need to order a few things, DO IT! No one is going to judge you and if they do, I would seriously rethink that friendship. And finally, if things don't go perfectly, it's okay. Life is messy and crap happens. You're not a failure, you're just human and so is everyone you're with. 

Well, that's it from me. Doing this event was super fun and I had been struggling with cooking and baking for a while because it brought up a lot of grief from me losing my Mom and Grandmother who taught me how to cook and bake. So to those of you struggling with grief, just know that it takes the time it takes. It's not a linear process it is cyclical, so make sure you are with folks who can support you through all the moments. 

More photos from the event for your enjoyment! 

Not Everyone can be Ned the Pie-Maker 

Tuesday, November 24 - Yes, I loved the show Pushing Daisies, but I'm not a big pie baker. I am a cake baker more than anything. Most people are the best at one baked good and then make everything else okay, but are most successful at one thing they bake. For some people it's cookies, others it's pies, for me it's cakes. But my roommate and I decided we'd make mini pies for this Thanksgiving since there will only be three of us eating at our apartment. Anything more than that is overkill and will have us with way too many leftovers. I mean, our turkey is already eight pounds which means I need to figure out some good recipes that aren't just sandwiches for the leftovers. 

For the pies, my roommate made the pie crust and I made the pecan pie filling, she made the pumpkin pie filling. 

I decided on a vegan pecan pie filling. The ingredients looked delicious and I'm really excited about it. I made half of the recipe so that I wouldn't be wasting any of it due to the fact that we were only making four mini pecan pies. 

If you're interested in trying it, here's the recipe I made - https://www.makingthymeforhealth.com/the-best-vegan-pecan-pie/

If you want to do it halfsies, here are the measurements:

1 tbsp vegan butter

1/4 c coconut sugar

1 1/2 tbsp cornstarch

3/4 c pecans

6 tbsp coconut milk

2 tbsp maple syrup

A major flaw you'll find in the recipe I linked to is that the recipe doesn't explain to you when you what to do with the cornstarch. You are to whisk the cornstarch into the milk before hand so that it will act as a thickener and won't be lumpy in your pie filling. 

Megan, my roommate made the gluten-free pie crust and pumpkin pie filling. If you're interested in the crust, here's the baker she got the recipe from: https://www.paleorunningmomma.com

Now, the truth is the first batch were in the oven a little too long so we had to do a take two on Wednesday. The recipe included the pumpkin pie filling and it is A LOT OF FILLING so it takes longer than we needed. And although they weren't in as long the pecan pies were burned. But even with halfing the pecan pie filling, I had enough to make four more mini-pies. 

I also jushed up some apple cider for us to drink on Thanksgiving Day on Monday night to go with our pies. 

Lemon Meringue is a Memory

When Pamela and I were recording the Thanksgiving episode of our podcast I asked her what some of her favorite dishes were with her family. She said that lemon meringue pie was her favorite pie even though it isn't technically seasonal and how she'd learned how to make it over the years so that when she can't go home for Thanksgiving, she can still make her favorite pie on that day. She's gotten the hang of it so much that now she experiments with it. 

It reminded me how my late paternal Grandmother would always make a special lemon meringue pie for me to take home after Thanksgiving dinner in North Carolina. She'd watch me take so many slices she recognized I really liked it and would make my own. The last one she made me, I had a feeling it might be her last and I couldn't eat it. I could feel that something was on the horizon and couldn't bring myself to eat the pie. That next spring, she passed away and during the conversation with Pamela I realized I haven't had a lemon meringue pie since. I can't bring myself to eat it. How sad. A pie that once brought me so much joy and gave my Grandmother joy to make an extra one just for me I haven't eaten since she died almost 18 years ago. 

Food holds so many memories. I don't know if I haven't eaten it because I only want to remember the ones she made me or if I'm afraid no one else's will ever be as good? But making pies this year for Thanksgiving I am hoping will be a therapeutic act for me. Thinking about how much baking and cooking are an inheritance in my family and how sad my Grandma Taylor would be (Yes, her name was Ella Mae Taylor which is super southern) if she knew I never ate another lemon meringue after she died. Life keeps going, you can't freeze it even as much as you sometimes want to. We have to move ahead, grow and learn to live in the new normal. I know this year is not easy, but I believe in us, I believe in you. With everything going on in the world, there are always things to be thankful for even when you're still grieving. We can be thankful that we had the people in our lives we did for the time that we did and that we get to have memories of them and the kindness and love they showed us. This Thanksgiving I'll be remembering Ella Mae making pies in her kitchen and smiling as she'd see her children and grandchildren eat them. And then I'll thank God that I get to have memories of her smiling and handing me my own pie to take home to show how much she loved me. 

Happy Pie-making Friends!